Wow. It's been a heck of a week! I'm sorry I've been so bad about updating this things lately, but I think it's at least a good sign that I'm more about being present than blogging these days, right?
I missed seeing everyone at Thanksgiving, but to be honest - I'm kind of glad I stuck around here. I'm also glad I didn't go camping like we were planning - it has been so nice (and necessary) to just have a few days to myself to veg out and recuperate. And the best part is... I STILL HAVE TWO DAYS LEFT! Haha, I'll tell you what - working 60 hours a week certainly makes you appreciate your vacation time a bit more.
I worked Monday and Tuesday, but I think mentally I checked out last Friday and since we didn't have to teach class this week, that was kind of okay. Our two days of work consisted of a lot of goofing around and pretending to be busy and it was nice to be at work without all the stress. The one important work thing that did happen was I had my midyear evaluation. I'll admit, I was a little nervous but everything went pretty well. My boss was nice, and the few more negative things he had to say were things I already knew to be working on.
Tuesday at lunch we all went to the Five Guys that just opened up by campus. Amy's from D.C. where Five Guys was started, so she was even more excited about it than I was. It was some serious greasy goodness - the only thing that would have been better is the Varsity. Tuesday night I hung out with Kevface and J Foulke for some roommate bonding time and then I went over to Amy's and watched "The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys." I liked it so much I watched again on Wednesday night! I can't believe I'm so type-able about what I like - give me a good angsty coming-of-age story any day and I'm happy.
Wednesday - J Foulke and I worked on our personal projects all day and right about 5 o'clock we both FINISHED!! Those of you who know what crazyness I've been working on all month - know how monumental it is that I'm finally done (ish) - and those of you who don't know what I'm talking about... be patient. You'll find out soon enough. Anyways it felt so amazing to finally be done - and as promised I gave myself the reward of a yearlong subscription to Entertainment Weekly - wooo! And at only $20 for 55 issues, it ain't bad. I'm pretty sure if I were a magazine I would be that one. And have I told you my friend Adam's cousin used to work for them in NYC. Aaaahhh!
We went to Denny's to celebrate (yeah... we're poor) and I realized that I am no longer capable of truly enjoying a belgian waffle with strawberry and whipped cream on top. Surprise surprise.
Thursday - HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! Though those of us still in town were far from our homes and families, we managed to have several awesome invites for Turkey Day. First, Rocky, Jess and I went to our boss's boss's house (Betty - she's the retired english teacher that is the program manager now at CF) for the big meal. It was really nice of Betty - she invited all of us homeless kids (in the home sense) over to her house to spend the day with her family. She has this beautiful ranch house down in Kyle, right near where I teach. And her whole family was there - her husband, bro-in-law, three kids + one daughter-in-law, and 3 grandkids including one very oversized baby boy who looks nothing like my nephew, Hunter, but made me think of him nonetheless. The food was DEE-licious. They also had unsweet ice tea which I never realized til yesterday was a staple of my Thanksgiving experience. The best part for me was the dressing... which I figured is specifically southern, being made of cornbread rather than bread bread. Awesomeness. To top it all off we had pecan pie for desert, but I was too full to enjoy a whole piece.
After hanging out at Betty's for a bit and watching a video of her granddaughter Riley shooting a dove with their BB gun in their backyard that morning (they made her eat it! it's their rule - you shoot it, you eat it), we headed out and went straight to Amy's for a second Thanksgiving feast. Amy's roommate Clara cooked the whole thing - including a homemade salad dressing from scratch! Unfortunately I was too full to eat anything other than some garlic mashed potatoes. We hung out at Amy's for hours, just vegging out and talking. And then Rocky and Jess left and Amy and I hung out some more. And then we came back to my place and played Wii! Woo! It was an awesome day of a whole lot of friends, "family," food, and fun.
This morning we got up early (10 am actually) and went to see the new Baz Luhrman movie Australia with Nicole Kidman and Hugh Jackman. It was AMAZING. Totally cheesy at parts and not at all surprising - but beautiful and epic and very well acted. It felt like what Hollywood is supposed to be about. It's not about real life - it's about romance and adventure and the things we dream about played out on screen.
Which reminds me - I have a small self-discovery moment to share. Another exceedingly obvious moment that took me 22 years to stumble into. I couldn't decide what I wanted to do with my life, right? Teach kids/work with kids -- or make movies? I love making things - writing and visualizing and bringing things to life, but I also know I get teenagers. I connect with them and I love them and I know how important that time in life is. So how could I in good conscience walk away from my gift with kids just for my own pleasure of creation? But what if? What if? What if my goal in writing and film was to speak to teenagers? To resonate with them and affect them the way certain movies and books affected my life back then. Everything seems so much more important when you're sixteen - even the stuff you read and watch. I could do that. And I'd be working with kids too, wouldn't I? And maybe someday down the road I could start a school - just like I talked about. A school that teaches teenagers how to channel all of the emotion and drama into art. Man - if I can speak to these kids - who knows? And if I could give them a voice... - this is everything - teaching, and helping, and film, and writing, and Invisible Children. Talk about a burning bush, right? Can I get an A-MEN?!
I don't know that I'd never made another kind of movie or book - but I've always had trouble trying to pick a focus - maybe now I have one. I feel more inspired than ever. My time is here.
Speaking of... do people really think that college is the best time of their lives? Do people really hate the time right after as much as they say? And does my life not count cause I'm hiding in AmeriCorps? Or did I just get super lucky?
Anyways - Australia was an awesome movie. And if you're on the fence, you should definitely see it. After the movie, we went to Kohl's so Jess could get a coat. I almost made it out the door without getting anything, but then I found this super cute and super cheap hoodie schwacket (sweater-jacket) that I had to have. After that I got on this super shopping kick - and Amy and Jess were in on it too so we went all over. But I didn't find anything so that was bad for me and good for my wallet.
I just want lots of cute winter skirts that I can wear with leggings. I have none. Old Navy used to have all these corduroy minis but they're sold out, and Target used to have this plaid mini dress but it was sold out too! BUMMER! I hate how winter confines me to jeans. In 10th grade I had this wool mini skirt that was sort of brownish gray - and it was the coolest thing ever. I wish I still had it. Alas.
Anyways, we finally came back home and now we're getting ready to go to dance at this electronica show. Ain't life grand?!
And btw - I almost forgot the best part of this week - we're catsitting! It's this adorable 6 month old orange tabby named Omar that belongs to a friend of ours at work. I love this cat. He's so much trouble but he is so stinkin' cute!
On the boy front: Joe has fallen off the grid -- apparently. His family's in town - so hopefully a better update on that scene after the holidays. We'll see!
Otherwise, my life continues to be awesome!
*Peace*
Friday, November 28, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
The Taskmaster's Enemy
There are significantly more important things I should be doing with my time, but -- as someone so astutely pointed out to me -- I can hardly demand that everyone update their blogs without updating my own. So thanks to you guys that updated - here's my turn.
Life continues on here in Austin. As usual, things are pretty good, albeit stressful. It's a stress I've come to expect, and even enjoy for the most part. That doesn't quite mean I want another year of it though. But I'm not quite knocking it off of the list yet.
I had a few of my kids drop the program last week and another kid fully (and obviously) plagarize an essay -- all of which were a bit of a downer. But my attendance is back up and my kids really dug the project I had them do last Thursday. Considering I deviated from the curriculum and made it up. I may have decided teaching isn't what I want right now - but it's still really cool seeing that I'm capable of it. Everyday I'm doing things I would hardly have thought myself capable of 3 months ago.
Speaking of which, this past weekend I celebrated my 3 month anniversary of moving to Austin. Ironically enough, I was in Atlanta at the time. I went home this weekend on a quasi-impromptu trip to witness Dr. Price's last Sunday at St. Luke's. I won't dedicate too much space on here to recounting my itinerary since I'm pretty sure most of the people that read this already know most of it. Suffice it to say that it was absolutely 100% worth it. The church party Saturday night and the service and luncheon Sunday were equal parts heartbreaking and warmly nostalgic.
Here are the highlights:
* seeing all of my parent's friends on Saturday night. I might be the only person on the planet that actually enjoys being smothered by church ladies but I sure do. It was also nice getting to tell everybody about my stellar new life. Made it seem even more real.
* getting complimented about 500 times on my rockin' new hairdo. How's that for validation?
* two words: Southern. barbeque.
* hanging out at Shannon's Saturday night with her, Don, Juan Martin, his CPC friend Ashley, Austin Igleheart, and Merdo. There's something so distinct about being a part of this St. Luke's generation, I can't get past it. In fact - it's inspired an entire other blog entry - so expect that as soon as I have some free time.
* "The Church's One Foundation" & "Blest Be the Ties that Bind" - Lord, I love church music. Speaking of which:
* The offertory song: text arranged by D. P. himself. Music arranged by Sue Mitchell Wallace. Beautiful. And somehow appropriate.
* The kid's sermon: D.P. talks to the children about saying good bye. He chokes up when telling them how much he loves them and how proud he is of them and how they are the future of the church. The rest of us choked up too.
* The announcement that Sara Barnhart and Nathan Kratzert both passed the bar exams, while Betsy Martin passed all 5 of her ordination exams.
* D. P.'s sermon: he forewent the words of wisdom I've come to somewhat expect from him in favor of a few important announcements. Namely:
- Shout outs to Terry Nall, Jane Allen, and Mary Martin. Could they have been anymore deserved?
- The big one: D.P. calls an older black man named Cleveland to the front of the church. My mom tells me he used to be our church janitor. D.P. thanks Cleveland for his friendship and tells the congregation that he had gotten ordained some time ago. Then he tells Cleveland that he wants him to have his pastoral robes. There was an audible gasp from the congregation, and those who weren't already crying started to. I can't even write about it without tearing up. He takes off his faded robes - the ones he's worn for decades and hands them to Cleveland, who accepts them and gives him a hug. D.P. reminds us that this means he is officially out of the pastor business and finishes his final sermon in his tie and slacks.
* D.P. announces his future plans - to start a summer camp for young girls, to encourage them and help them have positive self images in spite of all the pressure society puts on them. This was unexpected but cool, and given that he raised three daughters it makes sense.
* Presentation of gifts to Lauren and Jennifer - also Kate and June but they weren't there. The girls get beautiful shaws made by the SLPC knitting group, but the most beautiful part was the presentation by Dorothy Kitchens. She goes on and on about how much the girls have meant to her and how she loved getting to know them as a youth advisor. Then she breaks down completely as she tells them that if her girls end up being half the women they are, she'll know she's done a good job as a parent. Betsy Martin gives them the shaws, also crying a lot.
* Some Columbia Seminary guy charges D.P. and makes sure to tell him that God gave him incredible gift for preaching and that he should find a way to put that to use in his new life, THANK YOU!
* D.P. gives his last benediction - go in peace.
* At the luncheon the church unveils thte cherry tree they're planting in D.P.'s honor.
* The bitty children sing a song and Jack McKenney (as in the kid I babysat for in high school who is now 11) comes up to me, points to the kids and says: "aren't they cute?" OMG
* I go up to give D.P. a hug goodbye and - surprising myself - I tell him to call me if he needs employees for his camp. He responds seriously, saying that my name had actually come up and that he most certainly would. I'd never considered it before, but who knows. Life is funny that way.
All in all - it was an incredible experience and I am so grateful that I got to be there. You know it's been a long time since I've held any delusions of perfection about D.P., but he has helped shaped my life in so many ways. Every kid needs their Dumbledore and he was mine - right down to his humanization in the later years of my teenagehood. I don't know everything, but I know I'm going to miss him. I'm really really going to miss him.
Other good things about being home:
Seeing my dad! It was sooooo good to see him, and we had drinks together at Taco Mac. And then we had some delicious crab legs at Red Lobster for lunch the next day. And I got to hang out with Ansley and M.E. for a bit. And I got to see the skyline of Atlanta. Oh my God. Beautiful. From the condo til downtown, it was just a sea of trees in a thousand different colors and rising up out of this sea like a fairy tale castle was the skyline of this magnificent city. Life abounds endlessly in every direction. Austin is fabulous - but I love Atlanta.
In other news - things with Joe continue to be good. He drew me!
See below:
How cool is that? I don't know why it's so flattering when someone does something artistic that's about you - but man - it really is. Joe is nice. :)
Okay - that's all!
Life continues on here in Austin. As usual, things are pretty good, albeit stressful. It's a stress I've come to expect, and even enjoy for the most part. That doesn't quite mean I want another year of it though. But I'm not quite knocking it off of the list yet.
I had a few of my kids drop the program last week and another kid fully (and obviously) plagarize an essay -- all of which were a bit of a downer. But my attendance is back up and my kids really dug the project I had them do last Thursday. Considering I deviated from the curriculum and made it up. I may have decided teaching isn't what I want right now - but it's still really cool seeing that I'm capable of it. Everyday I'm doing things I would hardly have thought myself capable of 3 months ago.
Speaking of which, this past weekend I celebrated my 3 month anniversary of moving to Austin. Ironically enough, I was in Atlanta at the time. I went home this weekend on a quasi-impromptu trip to witness Dr. Price's last Sunday at St. Luke's. I won't dedicate too much space on here to recounting my itinerary since I'm pretty sure most of the people that read this already know most of it. Suffice it to say that it was absolutely 100% worth it. The church party Saturday night and the service and luncheon Sunday were equal parts heartbreaking and warmly nostalgic.
Here are the highlights:
* seeing all of my parent's friends on Saturday night. I might be the only person on the planet that actually enjoys being smothered by church ladies but I sure do. It was also nice getting to tell everybody about my stellar new life. Made it seem even more real.
* getting complimented about 500 times on my rockin' new hairdo. How's that for validation?
* two words: Southern. barbeque.
* hanging out at Shannon's Saturday night with her, Don, Juan Martin, his CPC friend Ashley, Austin Igleheart, and Merdo. There's something so distinct about being a part of this St. Luke's generation, I can't get past it. In fact - it's inspired an entire other blog entry - so expect that as soon as I have some free time.
* "The Church's One Foundation" & "Blest Be the Ties that Bind" - Lord, I love church music. Speaking of which:
* The offertory song: text arranged by D. P. himself. Music arranged by Sue Mitchell Wallace. Beautiful. And somehow appropriate.
* The kid's sermon: D.P. talks to the children about saying good bye. He chokes up when telling them how much he loves them and how proud he is of them and how they are the future of the church. The rest of us choked up too.
* The announcement that Sara Barnhart and Nathan Kratzert both passed the bar exams, while Betsy Martin passed all 5 of her ordination exams.
* D. P.'s sermon: he forewent the words of wisdom I've come to somewhat expect from him in favor of a few important announcements. Namely:
- Shout outs to Terry Nall, Jane Allen, and Mary Martin. Could they have been anymore deserved?
- The big one: D.P. calls an older black man named Cleveland to the front of the church. My mom tells me he used to be our church janitor. D.P. thanks Cleveland for his friendship and tells the congregation that he had gotten ordained some time ago. Then he tells Cleveland that he wants him to have his pastoral robes. There was an audible gasp from the congregation, and those who weren't already crying started to. I can't even write about it without tearing up. He takes off his faded robes - the ones he's worn for decades and hands them to Cleveland, who accepts them and gives him a hug. D.P. reminds us that this means he is officially out of the pastor business and finishes his final sermon in his tie and slacks.
* D.P. announces his future plans - to start a summer camp for young girls, to encourage them and help them have positive self images in spite of all the pressure society puts on them. This was unexpected but cool, and given that he raised three daughters it makes sense.
* Presentation of gifts to Lauren and Jennifer - also Kate and June but they weren't there. The girls get beautiful shaws made by the SLPC knitting group, but the most beautiful part was the presentation by Dorothy Kitchens. She goes on and on about how much the girls have meant to her and how she loved getting to know them as a youth advisor. Then she breaks down completely as she tells them that if her girls end up being half the women they are, she'll know she's done a good job as a parent. Betsy Martin gives them the shaws, also crying a lot.
* Some Columbia Seminary guy charges D.P. and makes sure to tell him that God gave him incredible gift for preaching and that he should find a way to put that to use in his new life, THANK YOU!
* D.P. gives his last benediction - go in peace.
* At the luncheon the church unveils thte cherry tree they're planting in D.P.'s honor.
* The bitty children sing a song and Jack McKenney (as in the kid I babysat for in high school who is now 11) comes up to me, points to the kids and says: "aren't they cute?" OMG
* I go up to give D.P. a hug goodbye and - surprising myself - I tell him to call me if he needs employees for his camp. He responds seriously, saying that my name had actually come up and that he most certainly would. I'd never considered it before, but who knows. Life is funny that way.
All in all - it was an incredible experience and I am so grateful that I got to be there. You know it's been a long time since I've held any delusions of perfection about D.P., but he has helped shaped my life in so many ways. Every kid needs their Dumbledore and he was mine - right down to his humanization in the later years of my teenagehood. I don't know everything, but I know I'm going to miss him. I'm really really going to miss him.
Other good things about being home:
Seeing my dad! It was sooooo good to see him, and we had drinks together at Taco Mac. And then we had some delicious crab legs at Red Lobster for lunch the next day. And I got to hang out with Ansley and M.E. for a bit. And I got to see the skyline of Atlanta. Oh my God. Beautiful. From the condo til downtown, it was just a sea of trees in a thousand different colors and rising up out of this sea like a fairy tale castle was the skyline of this magnificent city. Life abounds endlessly in every direction. Austin is fabulous - but I love Atlanta.
In other news - things with Joe continue to be good. He drew me!
See below:
How cool is that? I don't know why it's so flattering when someone does something artistic that's about you - but man - it really is. Joe is nice. :)
Okay - that's all!
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Rectified.
I'm sitting in my class right now, watching my kids goof off while they work--for the first time--on their college resumes. You should see them. They are so bright and vibrant and full of life and I want to give them the world. But the best part is, if I do my job right I won't have to. They'll take it for themselves. I may have decided that I don't want to spend the rest of my life teaching, but I am so incredibly happy to be doing this right now. I love these kids so much, even more than I thought I would.
And it's making me even more grateful for the people in my life that supported me when I was their age. The people that saw the potential in me the way I see it in my kids. It's so touching to think about now, seeing it from this side. I was so lucky to be so supported by such good people--my family, Shannon, Mrs. Britten, and many others.
Today was kind of an interesting day. I've been listening to Regina Spektor in my car and ate at Doc Green's for the first time since I left Atlanta, so I've been thinking a lot about home. But it's strange - I haven't been feeling homesick, I've just felt... home. It's nice.
I hung out with Joe last night and we had lunch together today. It's been really nice. More comfortable all the time. We're making plans. We're making plans and I'm (knock on wood) not freaking out or running away. It feels good. Really, really good.
But the main reason I wanted to write is because I've been meaning to write about something in here that my friend Amy and I have been talking about a lot this week. Which is that in certain ways - my life here feels like the rectification of my college experience. I had such lofty ideals of what college would be life before I left - that my roommate would be my new best friend, that I'd meet a whole lot of friends just like me, that I'd feel challenged and fulfilled at the same time. And for the most part, college didn't live up to that. It isn't that college wasn't great--it was--and I wish I had realized how great it was earlier than I did. But it didn't live up to the unrealistic expectations I had of it, and now it seems like CF is living up to them instead.
I do love my roommate, and I've found all these people that I have so much in common with that--really, for the first time--I feel like I've fully embraced the person that I am. It wasn't when I expected it - but it's far better. I love this life.
Back to my kids.
Paz!
And it's making me even more grateful for the people in my life that supported me when I was their age. The people that saw the potential in me the way I see it in my kids. It's so touching to think about now, seeing it from this side. I was so lucky to be so supported by such good people--my family, Shannon, Mrs. Britten, and many others.
Today was kind of an interesting day. I've been listening to Regina Spektor in my car and ate at Doc Green's for the first time since I left Atlanta, so I've been thinking a lot about home. But it's strange - I haven't been feeling homesick, I've just felt... home. It's nice.
I hung out with Joe last night and we had lunch together today. It's been really nice. More comfortable all the time. We're making plans. We're making plans and I'm (knock on wood) not freaking out or running away. It feels good. Really, really good.
But the main reason I wanted to write is because I've been meaning to write about something in here that my friend Amy and I have been talking about a lot this week. Which is that in certain ways - my life here feels like the rectification of my college experience. I had such lofty ideals of what college would be life before I left - that my roommate would be my new best friend, that I'd meet a whole lot of friends just like me, that I'd feel challenged and fulfilled at the same time. And for the most part, college didn't live up to that. It isn't that college wasn't great--it was--and I wish I had realized how great it was earlier than I did. But it didn't live up to the unrealistic expectations I had of it, and now it seems like CF is living up to them instead.
I do love my roommate, and I've found all these people that I have so much in common with that--really, for the first time--I feel like I've fully embraced the person that I am. It wasn't when I expected it - but it's far better. I love this life.
Back to my kids.
Paz!
Sunday, November 2, 2008
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